Ooops!!! Episode 1: Calling Dr. Grey

Hmmmm.....well. I'm writing today I haven't written in a while and how do I start??? Well we all make mistakes right? Actually I know the answer to this question and yes we do. I should know, I have made my fair share, but I just made another, but this one is taking the cake. Ok, first off calm down....I figure if you're reading this you know me and you also know about Grey's Anatomy and Dr. Meredith Grey who well, sleeps around whenever she feels lonely after pineing for McDreamy. I like Meredith have my own McDreamy...however, unlike Dr. Grey I do not sleep around. So I just wanted to allow everyone to breathe a sigh of relief. I am a virgin and I plan to continue down this path of virginity until marriage people, that is not going to change. However, I did make a mistake with a guy...I gave him my number and he asked to see me again...yeah so to most people its not a big deal, but hey I'm not most people and to me it is. My friend Candice and I went out on Thursday night, I was able to since our ILLINI men's b-ball team won! and I was leading in my bracket scores!!!!, anyway we went out. I met a guy....we talked...I soon found out he wanted more than just to talk, but I didn't give in...but he made feel bad that I didn't. I dunno it's bothering me...alot. I guess it shouldn't, but it left me feeling really vulnerable, I mean is that what everyone wants...sex???? I can't give it so what does that mean for me? Then I was like thinking about J.A. the guy I really like and would love to go out with, but I was thinking what if J's the same??? Then what???? I only like him. So what do I do if he turns out to be jerk like the guy last night? Then I won't have anyone to like!!! I enjoy liking guys...I think I enjoy the crush more than actually being with a guy, well no, I think I would be very happy with J. I'm just thinking that I'm the last one left. The last person who thinks the way I do...oh well...I don't plan on changing anytime soon...if anything I'd become a Nun.